Just as he had many times before, Cassian calmed the creature that had started to stir. At first, Regan had tasted bitter disappointment every time her beast was subdued. But now she saw it for what it was: a necessary precaution and, hopefully, a temporary one. It would take time—Cassian had said as much—and Regan trusted him to guide her. Evidently, the wary rumbling of her wolf had not gone unnoticed. Regan’s brow furrowed, looking at Grant with an expression that sat halfway between embarrassment and irritation. Embarrassment, because she knew Grant’s concern had foundation in fact: she was the one who had lashed out at Alys and, more seriously, the king. Irritation, because evidently, Grant felt the need to call attention to it.

It was, of course, about more than that. Grant’s homecoming was charged with all kinds of emotions that were too big and complicated to process at present. Regan let herself sit with the feeling for a moment before turning her eyes and thoughts back to Cassian.

Cassian's eyes remained on Alys as people started to depart. He didn't miss the way she gazed after the Dresmondi. There was something there. Who knew what all had transpired in the months the four had traveled together? Still, it was an unsettling thing to see up close.

"Everyone out." Cassian said after the Dresmondi were gone and wouldn't be offended. Without delay those in the throne room started to peel away. Only Regan and the royal guard beside her would remain, knowing they were the exception to--

"Both of you, too." Cassian said over his shoulder. There was no room for arguing. Rather than taking Alys to a private room, he'd simply made the throne room private. No doubt her curiosity and alarm was rising, but rightfully so. He was about to ruin the life she had chosen.

Only after Regan left would Cassian return his attention to Alys. He had already planned exactly how he would say this. That is, there would be no beating around the bush. A simple sentence. Alys was strong, she could take it. She had surely lost many in her lifetime, and would continue to lose. Still, he wanted her to have the privacy to respond in any way she desired.

Only when he had her full attention, after the room had sat silent for some seconds, did he let the words fall from his mouth:

"Your husband is dead." Beat. "A servant found his body in the woods behind your home." He was taking advantage of the first few moments of shock. "Your children have been living here, in the castle, with their nursemaid and their aunt overseeing them."

One by one. Everyone was exiting the room. Her focus back on Cassian, she felt unease start to settle in, but surely this was just because he was happy she was home? He wanted to express that in front of very few, so she settled. Until he dismissed even the last two of his royal guards. Her breath was leaving her with a tremble in them. Her chest started to ache, but a hopeful voice said it was only because she had been gone so long. He wanted a moment just for them…

It was a ridiculous thought. And it was a thought quickly shattered and blown away with the first blow being delivered.

“Your husband is dead.”

Logan’s face flashed in front of her. Her brows drawing together as she was trying to process what was being said.

"A servant found his body in the woods behind your home.”

Why… why would he be behind their home? Logan Delaney… dead? No. No that wasn’t true, it couldn’t- her head was already shaking back and forth in disbelief.

“Your children have been living here, in the castle, with their nursemaid and their aunt overseeing them.”

Goddess which aunt? She had sister’s herself, but she felt she already knew. Brenna’s face, scowling with disapproval, flickered through her mind.

Alys hadn’t realized it, but tears had already gathered as things started firing off in her head. “He… that can’t be true.” She looked back at Cassian. She was denying it, yet she knew that he’d have no reason to lie about something like this. Her hand came up and started rubbing at her sternum. A vibrating shaking her arms as her mind suddenly kicked into high gear. “No he- he has been doing lessons, at our home… the twins…” she sudden could feel the skin splitting tension starting to push at her. “Cassian no,” she rubbed circles, harder on her chest. Trying to suppress the feeling. “No,” her voice trembling and strained with emotion.

Hot tears fell down those freckled cheeks. “Please, he can’t,” she was struggling now. He would surely know it. Feel it with the bond they shared.

Cassian hadn’t wanted to string her along. All at once, each gong falling. She’d be reeling regardless, he had reasoned. Watching her now, he wondered if that had been the best course.

His thumb touched the ring on his finger once more, moving it just slightly, activating its magic. He willed the growing panic in her to be suppressed. Not the sadness. Not the shock. The panic. That frantic was that would have her violently shifting. She would feel it ebb away, and surely not understand why. He’d told her about the ring, but only as far as his wolf was concerned. She would not know that it could suppress virtually anything.

“I can call for the nursemaid…” he offered, but he doubted it was more details that she needed. Really, what she needed was—

Cassian opened his arms to her, inviting her to come in, if it was comfort that she sought.

It was crushing down on her, and she swore for a moment, her fingers had claws burst through them. Then it was almost gone. Not her whole being, but the crippling urge to shift and lose control within her panic and emotions. Which only left her with a numbing pain and sorrow deep within her chest. One that brought a hand to wipe quickly at her eyes, still mumbling ‘no,’ over and over again. Sometimes just a whisper, other times a painful low moan.

Yet the moment his arms opened, she rushed forward. Letting him do what he offered, her face pressed to his shoulder and shifted to the crook of his neck, and the tears left her in a rush. The first sob wrecked her, her arms wrapping him tightly, fisting the fabric at his back and for the first time in years, she let that control go. Whatever suppressed the blinding panic, allowed her to freely grieve. “I don’t understand,” she said between sobs. And her knees gave out, leaning into the king.

Logan Delaney. Gone.

A long few minutes passed as she cried, picturing the man who had filled the last six years of her life. The ups, the downs, the good, the sorrowful, the painful. Even if Alys had always been conflicted about loving two different men, it didn’t help her by losing one. Or lessen the blow that was delivered with Logan’s loss as the other man delivered the news.

“When…?” She asked, her voice raw and sniffling against him. The ring suppressing her, and she was sure it help suppress the magic that had wanted to burst from her violently, though perhaps she had been so tied up in pain that even her mind didn’t register the words to cause such distraction in the moment. “Atlas… Adalyn… are they?” Goddess she remembered he said that they were there but were they… safe? Okay? Unharmed?

Cassian held her close as she sobbed into his neck. He didn’t often touch others, so while the contact was unusual for him it wasn’t unwelcome. With the grieving woman in his arms, he took a moment to breathe, to be. To remember. At one point in time what they had had kept him grounded. It had kept him from being lonely. He remembered what it had been like to look her in her eyes and lose her, and he didn’t envy her. A dark thought dared to wonder if it was better to lose a lover to death than to rejection.

“She said he spiraled after you left.” Cassian said quietly, his words hollow. “His death was reported within two weeks, the funeral held a week later. They would have waited but…” But Nevermereans didn’t know how to preserve bodies past a certain point. They’d waited as long as they could, hoping she returned, but then they did what they needs to: they moved on.

“The children have been in the castle most of the season.” There was an irony to there to be exploited at another time.

Gut wrenching guilt was the next emotion to capture her. She had been the cause behind it. Even though they had seen him slowly slipping and losing touch with the reality, when he was consumed by dark and jealous thoughts, they had tried. But it was her leaving, even with the promise of being back, that had been his undoing. Her eyes screwed shut, her face leaning into him more. But it was the next sentence that had her peeling away. Her eyes wide, as she stared at him, her hands still gripping onto his shirt.

He’d see it in her eyes, the realization that Alys had lost her opportunity to say goodbye. That she had no means of physically being able to say a blessing over him being he was pushed out to sea. She’d never get to be the one to light his raft. The shaking started again, she wanted the wolf to take over, but without the urge there, she was left trembling before him as her knees hit the floor. Her hands releasing him and pressing to her eyes to try and release the pressure in her head…

And she screamed.

Later on, she’d swear she had heard the glass shake on the windows and felt the ground tremble under her. But it couldn’t have… but she screamed, letting the sorrow be heard in her cry and her head pressed to the cold stone. Her fingers lost into her curls as she tried to release a pain that couldn’t be let go. No matter what incantation or summoning she pulled, it wouldn’t ease her of the loss. “My-“ her words were trembling by the time she pushed herself up, dark eyes flashing up to Cassian through waterlined eyes. “Children… I want them.” There was a growl to her voice as she said it. “I need to see them.” She needed to know they were okay. Yet if he tried to leave, her hand would shoot out to grab at his leg. And she’d beg that he not leave.

Cassian did not stop her from giving full vent to her spirit. He stood by with his hands clasped in front of him, eyes downcast on the cobblestone floor of the throne room. Everyone processed loss differently. Some just didn’t process it at all. He stood quietly by. Alys had been robbed of the opportunity to send her husband’s body off; he wouldn’t rob her of this.

When she stood Cassian’a eyes found her and followed her up. There was something about her, something dangerous. The eyes. The growl. He remained where he stood.

“No.” Cassian said quietly. He hasn’t moved to retrieve them. “Do not do this to them.” It almost sounded like a request, but he was the king and could deny his subjects anything, even their own children. “Mourn. Bathe. Eat. Then, when you have your color and your heart, see them.”

“No?” Her face pinched in disbelief. No? He was telling her she couldn’t see her children? Even as he pressed, a gentle coaxing to her, she practically exploded then. “I will not be able to do any of those things until I see they are safe with my own eyes.” She told him, a slight plea to her words as she looked at him as she always had. Not the King of two kingdoms, though he very much was, but the man she knew.

“Please,” she came out breathless, her breathing ragged as she flexed her fingers at her sides. Everything ached and she wanted to lash out but she needed to be soothed. The idea of eating made her sick to her stomach. Bathing… was more palpable but she didn’t know what to say. What to do. Logan was gone. Had everyone but her gotten to say goodbye… her and Grant? Had they given him the respect he had earned all these years? Brenna had been bitter and cold, cutting her brother off when they had married. Because of her… but did she mourn him like he deserved?

She prayed Kennet had at least stepped in and made sure…

Fresh tears fell again, and she wiped quickly at her face. The face that was pale now and tear stained. “I need to see them Cassian.”

Alys wasn’t in her right mind. She was flooded with grief and had no control. Only his ring was keeping her from shifting. She was growling when she spoke about her kids. She couldn’t see it, deep in it as she was, but he could. For her sake and her kids’ sakes, his answer would not change.

“No.” He said it again, and if she decided to hate him for it then so be it. What she didn’t realize was they everyone had moved on. Bringing her fresh wave of pain and grief into the lives of blessedly ignorant five-year-olds was the last thing they needed. They knew their father was dead, yes, but playing and desserts and walking along the ocean had brought them joy. The young child bounced back so much better. Alys want to see her kids now was born of selfish desire, as she admitted. Cassian was thinking of her kids.

“You are in no state.”

“You are in no state.”

“You would keep my own children from me?” There was a new breaking inside of her, her heart shattering in a new way as she stood before him. He had isolated her before, but from him. Now, it was her own flesh and blood. Her own children who were somewhere in the castle being looked after by people who wouldn’t and couldn’t love them the way she did. The way Logan had.

Logan. Her children. Something else had been off in the air before when he had entered the room. Was it just this impending news he had to deliver? Exhaustion still ran through her from travel and her eyes burned now from the endless tears that ranged from hurt, to anger, to sorrow filled.

And there it was. The assumption. The accusation that cast him as the villain and her as the victim. She couldn’t see well through her tears.

Cassian could have repeated what he already said to her, but he didn’t. He remained still, eyes calmly resting on her, waiting either for her to see his reason or… Who knows what a distraught witch might do?